Another birthday has come and gone.
And what a birthday it was. I’m actually proud to share my age with others. I never thought I’d feel so good and be so content at this age. In case you didn’t read it on Facebook, I am now 77 years old. Yikes. When my grandmother was this age, she seemed old to me. Wonderfully kind and nurturing but old. I well remember her driving us to the park to ride the merry-go-round every night during those two weeks my siblings and I visited every summer. The remarkable thing was that she had no license. Had never really learned to drive a stick shift but we got there any way, in first gear.
When my mother was 77, she was still extremely active, belonged to a fitness center but I still thought of her as older than I feel today. I wonder if she thought of herself as old at 77. I wonder.
She died just short of 90, having survived breast cancer at 80 and an aortic aneurysm at 85. She was a strong spirit and I admired her so much. She learned to drive a car at 52. Unbeknownst to our family, she took driver’s ed on her lunch hour from work and presented her license at the supper table one night. My dad was flummoxed. The next day he bought her a little yellow used Pinto. She was thrilled.
When I was 52 I took motorcycle training. My first bike was a Honda Rebel but I graduated to a Harley super glide. I felt like I was following in her footsteps. If she could do what she did, so could I. She said she worried about me on that bike but was proud of me too. I think we had a really special bond.
It sometimes takes aging to fully appreciate what others taught us, what others meant to us, what values others instilled in us. Every day I am glad I got sober so that I had a chance to show my parents who I really wanted to be, rather than who I was for so many years. That’s one of the greatest gifts of sobriety, I think. We can grow into the people we were born to be. Even though we got off track for awhile, we had a destiny I think and living that destiny today gives me such sweet pleasure.
I am not sure where I am heading tomorrow but I do know I will be led to fulfill what’s next on God’s agenda for me. And that gives me quiet contentment.
I hope you are experiencing contentment today too.
Happy Belated Birthday Karen!
Isn’t it strange I feel that the older I get the less fear I have and the easier it is to be brave. I have gone back to college at age 48 and even though I wonder at times what I was thinking I feel like I am finishing something that I started back in my 20’s so to me it is not so much about the degree but more about fullfilling a dream from long ago. It is funny how life turns you in so many directions and yet somehow with the guidance of God and the holy spirit I have found my path again.
As always, thanks, rani, for your input.
Many blessings on your journey,