I didn’t grow up in a “faith-filled” home. I never observed any one at 827 being quietly peaceful, trusting that the experiences we were sharing would work out OK. The days and nights were generally very tense, undergirded with the expectation that an outburst over something, large or small, imagined even, might occur at any moment. And usually did. Night after night the feel[...]
2 I am often the only person in a collection of friends who is genuinely happy that Christmas is heading toward us, at full-speed. I have loved every aspect of the holidays since childhood. Is it because I grew up in a healthy, happy family? Not really. But we did seem to rise above the tension, the chaos and cutting criticism for most of the month of December. Mom made candy, lots[...]
I don’t know about you but I have stumbled many times getting to where I am now. I began stumbling, literally, when I took my first drink at 13. Hiding behind the garage at an outdoor family gathering, I gulped down my whiskey and coke before any one could notice me. The rush I felt was quickly matched by the uneasiness I experienced as I headed back to the group. With darting vi[...]
I began the practice of “stepping aside” only after years of stepping into business that was clearly not my own. I had mistakenly assumed that helping others make their decisions was an important “calling.” It showed them I cared. It was my way of remaining important to them. Or so I thought. From childhood on I had virtually always felt on the edge of abandonment. By[...]
The gift of a somewhat retired life is having the time to fully appreciate the power of now, the power of nothingness. Which is, of course, the power of everythingness. This is a space I'm growing into in these days and weeks, hopefully months and years too, since turning 74. Everythingness, what a glorious doorway to the unfolding of a life already well lived, and yet one that is ripe for[...]
I have lost a number of very good friends over the past couple of years. And I have mementoes from three of the women in my study. From one a rock, from another a book and the third, a pin. I find myself looking at their pictures, holding their remembrances, and feeling their presence in a very distinct way each time. I think of these women, and my mother too, as the angels who ho[...]
I’ve mentioned in other posts how important A Course in Miracles has been to my spiritual development. Because “the course” complements the twelve steps of AA and Al-Anon, I feel many moments of actual joy nearly every day, a pay-off I had never expected. These three pathways have grounded me. For sure, had I not found both twelve step programs a number of decades ago, prior to[...]
W.A.I.T. is an acronym for why am I talking? A young woman shared this idea at one of my AA meetings a few years ago. I had never heard it before but have used it, remembered it, forgotten it, and denied it to myself hundreds of times since then. It's a brilliant shortcut to staying out of the thick of someone else's business. It is all so easy to stick my nose in where it isn't ne[...]
I am beginning a new book. As I "see" it now, it will be a book of essays that will drive home to the reader the idea that just because we are moving into a later stage of life, we need not assume that our joys will diminish. On the contrary, for most people they will flourish because they are relieved of myriad responsibilities they were saddled with in the earlier decades of life. [...]
Feeling hopeless about a situation in your life makes all forward movement seem impossible. It’s not an accident that we have people around us who can share our sorrows and express hope for us when our own is depleted. Our lives are quite intentional, aren’t they? As has been said by thousands of people, nothing is happening accidentally. When one of us is down, another person ap[...]