We have only two emotions: love and fear. . .
Coming to understand and then appreciate the truth of this statement has released me from many hours, even days, of pain and uncertainty. Perhaps I need to clarify this belief I so cherish. I think that every action and every thought that’s harbored by any one of us, 24/7, is reflecting a feeling of love or fear in that moment. Believing this has honestly changed my life. Let me explain.
First of all, if I am verbally attacked by some one, I immediately remember that he or she is afraid in that moment, and quite likely afraid about some thing that has no connection to me at all. We are all guilty of striking out at the unsuspecting fellow traveler simply because he or she is “there,” and we are suddenly disturbed about some thing. My own experience of being on either end of the attack, either the receiver or the perpetrator, has convinced me that it’s seldom related to any thing that is happening in that moment. The past is usually the impetus for an attack, a past that is far from relevant now. In fact, many would say, and count me as one of the many, that the past has no relevance for any thing once its moment is gone. To live here and now, fully, would actually free us of ever wanting to be an “attacker” of any kind.
It truly amazes me how my own life has “softened” since coming to believe this idea. It’s not a new idea, for sure. Wise men and women have shared it for eons but we resist it because fighting the attacker feels so good, unfortunately. We have an entire sporting industry that relies on us wanting to cheer one side or the other on, to prove how adept at attacking they are. And some watch reality shows solely because potential winners and losers are pitted against each other. Seeing one fall gives the onlooker an unholy sense of satisfaction.
There are many forms of “attack.” Not all of them with the intention of destruction. And yet, when the ego is in charge of an attack, even though only a verbal one, it’s hope is to bring the other person to his or her knees. From my perspective, wishing failure on any one wounds all of us. Further, I’m convinced that we are alive to serve as healers to one another.
Maybe I am coming down too hard on sports “lovers” and reality shows addicts, but I do see an unholy alliance at work when people get in a frenzy over any drama that is playing out before them. The return to love and all that it brings with it doesn’t say we can’t enjoy competition, but having a balanced view serves human kind. And that’s our goal, isn’t it?