Are you content, right here, right now? \u00a0If you aren’t, (and I surely don’t claim to be content every moment, ) then you have some work to do. \u00a0It’s our responsibility, \u00a0and only our responsibility, to reach a place of contentment moment by moment. \u00a0When we put the burden on others to make us content, we chance driving them away. \u00a0And if they aren’t driven away, at the very least they will begin to resent us. \u00a0And rightly so. \u00a0We don’t want the burden of making others happy on our shoulders, so we shouldn’t put it on the shoulders of others to make us happy. \u00a0It’s a heavy load.<\/p>\n
One of the realizations I had a few decades ago was that I had allowed everyone in my life to define me; whatever they did made me happy, mad or sad. \u00a0And I mean every one! \u00a0If you were a \u00a0friend, a lover, a colleague, or even a complete stranger; I quite willingly gave you power over my moods, and my self-worth too. \u00a0How you treated me, or mistreated me, \u00a0determined what I thought of myself. \u00a0If you dismissed me as unimportant to your life, I felt diminished. \u00a0If you scowled at me, I tried to discern what I had done to cause your displeasure. \u00a0There simply was no me, in me.<\/strong> \u00a0I was little more than a reflection of you. \u00a0Eventually I tried to fill the hollowness with alcohol and drugs but that was to no avail. \u00a0That’s fortunate, in fact. The sense of power they gave me eventually turned on me, as is true for every alcoholic, at least all the ones I’ve met in the rooms of AA.<\/p>\n Discovering how to find contentment, how to create it, in fact; has been the focus of my journey these last few decades. \u00a0And what good practices I have developed. \u00a0I didn’t “invent” these practices. \u00a0I sat at the feet of many wise souls, in the meetings and in books, and tried what had worked for others. \u00a0Lo and behold, my life began to change. \u00a0Before I even knew what was happening, my inner core began to resonate to new ideas. \u00a0I wasn’t living in the shadows of everyone else any more; I was creating my own shadow. \u00a0If you weren’t smiling, I no longer assumed it was my fault. \u00a0If you treated me with any form of disrespect, I knew you were having a bad day. \u00a0Not me.<\/p>\n This tiny little awareness created a gigantic shift in my personality. \u00a0No longer was I dependent on you for good feelings or bad. \u00a0No longer did I need your approval or your emotional support. \u00a0No longer was I tied to you for any part of my inner core. \u00a0It was solely my creation. \u00a0Being blessed with the responsibility for who we are every moment is a wonderful gift. \u00a0Don’t postpone opening it. \u00a0Your life deserves the change that’s sure to come.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Are you content, right here, right now? \u00a0If you aren’t, (and I surely don’t claim to be content every moment, ) then you have some work to do. \u00a0It’s our responsibility, \u00a0and only our responsibility, to reach a place of contentment moment by moment. \u00a0When we put the burden on others to make us content, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3196","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-circle-of-family-and-friends-you-and-your-personal-community"],"yoast_head":"\n